CRAZY SHTUFF THAT HAPPENS IN MY HOUSE!

It may be that I am becoming more zen due to the 5 yoga classes I've been to; or maybe I'm just beginning to see the humor in 'mi vida loca'. Anyway, for a few days I've been stepping outside of whatever the 'crazy situation at hand' happens to be at the moment, and becoming the 'observer' of the chaos. Here's a little list, in random order, for your entertainment:

1. WWF ultimate showdown(toddler division) in the living room for the plastic potty full of peepee!

I don't know how a tiny 2 year old can have such a kung fu death grip when they decide they want something!?!
I am all about being a free spirited willy nilly unschooly mom,
but having pee sloshing all over the house from the front door to the toilet is not something i am willing to do!

2. Peeing in an empty formula can in the middle of the living room!

8 yo thinks its a great idea to make 'stilts' from old formula cans. She cuts and glues all colors of construction paper to this thing, gets it all pretty, and then, of course, leaves it in the middle of the floor. 2 yo, having peed in the little container(her potty) in the middle of the living room floor for days now, thinks this is just the newer, prettier version, and pops a squat right there! 8 yo was not happy! 2yo cheers herself for peeing on the potty again, takes a bow and says 'thank you'!

3. Streaking through the apartment complex.

so, obviously we are developing some new potty skills lately, which leaves the 2 yo naked most of the day. i was bringing boxes of donation stuff out to the truck, and nudy bird escaped, and greeted me in the parking lot! if only i could have gotten a picture of that! the look on her face when she saw the surprise in mine! arms wide open, mouth wide open, screaming and hauling ass down the sidewalk! who could help but laugh at that?

4. Stepping on own foot, crying, but not getting off of own foot!

Same naked 2 yo is stepping on book, "Manatee Winter", somehow gets one foot under book, and one foot on top, so is smashing her own foot with the book! Stands there crying, doesn't know who's crushing her foot! I say move your foot, she steps off the book, all is well.

5. Naked 2 yo signs bird, cat, and 'butt'.

We got a sign language video from the library, and have been watching it together every night. So we are all trying out these new signs, and wanting to see if any of it is sinking in with the very busy, naked, streaking, peeing, wrestling 2 yo.
Dad asks, what's this... and does the sign for bird (pointer and thumb make 'tweet' motion in front of your mouth)
She says ....'BIRD'! yaaaaay!
Dad asks, what's this... does the sign for cat (thumb and pointer grab near cheeks and pull away from face like pulling whiskers)
She says.... 'CAT'! yaaaaaay!
Dad asks, what's this....does the sign for dog (pat thigh like calling a dog to come here)
She says ..........'BUTT'!
everyone ROFL!


AND, when i first started typing this entry, 8 yo, who was cooking corn on the cob, (insisted she do it all by herself)
had already asked me 5 thousand questions about how to make corn on the cob, (which pot to use, where is it, which cabinet, which color pot, what size, how much water, which burner, what number, right or left, front or back, big or little, hot or cold water, how is the corn gonna fit, how long, etc, etc, etc,) and was politely asked to not speak to me again until the water was actually boiling... slithers over to the sofa, slides me a note on orange construction paper, and takes off laughing and running!

Note says:

123
eye heart u mama

sorry
i might have cooked your fish


(i was thawing salmon on a tray on one side of the stove, she turned on the wrong burner)

helpful bit of information:
ACTUAL INSTRUCTIONS FOR MAKING CORN ON THE COB:
1. remove any fish or other objects from burner
2. go to this website, follow instructions (who knew so many people needed help with this?)